Trapped
by Izzu
Summary: Mid-45 and 46 hinting. Doctor Maki's words kept on bothering him and Ankh started having second thoughts. But where else can he go from this point? Fixed.


az: Rewrote the second half of the shot. Writing this because Maki bothered me.

* * *

><p><span>Trapped<span>

Written by Izzu

o

o

__"The Greeeds, which are mere collection of medals; have no life. He has not died, just ceased to be. That's all."__

He hated it. He disliked this line of thought. If he—and the others—had no life, what was this existence of their consciousness means? Is that not Life? Even if they were not humans, even if they were created—even if their whole existence were based on some collection of medals; they have their own thoughts, their own will. Did that not matter?  
><em><br>_"The meeting of two strangers will bring forth a new Birth!"__

_"Happy Birthday!"_

Ankh's lips twitched a little. Why on earth was he suddenly reminded of that Kougami Kousei? But somehow... now, compared to Doctor Maki's opinion; he rather preferred Kougami's way of thinking.

Ankh shook his head. What was he thinking? Did he even _know_ what Kougami think for real about everything?

Nevertheless, was he wrong in referring to themselves in human terms? After all, what other concept could he refer to... concerning their own existence? He could barely remember that first moment when he had acquired his consciousness—but that time, was it wrong to say that he had been _born_? Even if humans had brought forth the creation of their core medals, they had no power in the creation of their—the Greeeds'—consciousness. He doubted those alchemists even knew what they were doing half the time, it was just luck that they even managed to do this; the creation of Greeeds. To refer to Greeeds as mere _things_, not a being... that was so much like the pride of humans. How hateful! He started to hate himself more, being a Greeed because of this!

"You seemed different than before... Ankh. Is it because of that body?"

Hah! Worst timing for Mezool to come bother him; just as he was feeling terribly upset right now.

"Hey, what it feels like to feel the way humans do? You've been eating, seeing and hearing things differently after all. How was it?"  
><em><br>_Ankh snorted. "You __Greeeds_ _could never understand it."

"You're talking as if you're not one of us."

Yes, what of him? At this rate... his existence, what could he be then? He started to think more like a human, yet he was not. He was a Greeed, yet he grew even more unlike the Greeed he was. If he was to be neither human nor Greeed... then what was it he supposed to be?

"Ah. I hated the humans, but more than that... I hated the Greeeds."

xxx

He was sick of everything. Yet he could not allow his existence to end now, if he could help it. Did he make the wrong decision to side with Doctor Maki? That human—or Greeed?—cared nothing about him or his desire. That person only cared if consuming even more cores would make him go out of control.

He was being used. He knew that. He allowed that to happen. Now he regretted it.  
><em><br>"Medal, medal, medal! Is that the only thing you guys were thinking about?"_

Ankh snickered to himself. It was laughable to think he would be saying things like that now. Ankh clutched his chest. Was it because of this body? As expected of Mezool to have noticed it before, then again they have known each other from far back. Amongst all of them, Mezool would have noticed if there was any slight changes in him. Of how un-Greeedlike he was becoming. Funny on how he never noticed it himself.

_"Don't prioritise Medals over people's lives!" _

He snorted.

_"My bad, but I'm also lacking in medals at the moment."_

Who was getting their priorities mixed up this time? Eiji... or himself? To get what he wants, he needed medals. Yet, he now despised the very urge to gather more core medals to save himself. An irony? He initially thought to_ ally_ himself with the other Greeeds because he thought that was the faster method to gather all of the core medals. Compared to doing it alone, considering what happened with Eiji—or just having Uva as an ally. Guess it was tricky. Either way he was at his wit's end.

Those wretched purple cores! He wonder who was the more dangerous, Doctor Maki... or Eiji? Ankh sighed.

Compared to the previous OOO, he thought Eiji was different. He thought if he could just keep Eiji under his watch, everything would work to his benefit. Because unlike the previous OOO, Eiji did not have any desire about ruling the world. But somehow, now... he wondered if he made a wrong judgement about that. Could he be wrong about it? Eiji might not have much in terms of a desire, but his dreams...

Life. In order to achieve that thing he was yearning for, he needed to acquire more cores. In order to acquire more cores, he needed to keep the _life_ he had at the moment from fading out of existence. In order to not allow himself to disappear before he could achieve his desires, he needed to put OOO to a stop.

OOO. Eiji.

He could not believe that Eiji could still make him angry, enough to make him take drastic measures as inserting Kazari's cores into this human body. Somehow it vexed him so much that Eiji cared more about this human compared to _him. _It was so infuriating, so vexing—having to watch Mezool, Uva and Gamel arguing about getting back their cores ended up being the last straw. He could not help himself but unleash his bottled up fury on them.

Surprisingly, throwing out all those cores sent him an unexplained surge of relief. Relief? Could you believe that? Was it not the very purpose of him joining the others were of those cores? He could have just let Maki handle those three, he could have just fly away. Instead he laughed and threw out those cores carelessly as if they do not matter.

Was there something wrong with him?

It hurt. Being referred as a mere _thing_, hurt really badly. Yet, if he had heard this very same statement eight hundred years ago he probably would not feel a thing.

"Is this your fault? Izumi Shingo!"

Ankh collapsed onto the floor before taking out the phone belonging to Shingo. He turned it on as image of Hina greeted him. Immediately he recalled his last exchange with her.

"What are you expecting me to do then? I want to _live!_ I won't become more alive just _staying_ with you guys!"

Ankh threw the phone aside before wrapping his arms around his legs. Night seemed a bit more longer than usual.


End file.
